Inhabit College

I have hosted two focus groups for parents of high school and college students this week.  The point was for them to play OPTION PLAY and for me to tell them about LEARN HOW TO USE YOUR RUBY SLIPPERS.

The groups were small (3 each), which has its own problems because OPTION PLAY requires 6-8 players so that enough answers and discussion happens.  The participants were awesome because they were smart, funny, honest, and gave me good feedback even if they felt something didn't work. It is always a pleasure to play with people who can lose themselves a bit in the process.  It is a challenge to be the parent of a child who is in high school or college because that child is moving into their own journey but still needs the love and support of their parents.  It is a messy time, because learning should be messy as it is full of trial and error.  And, learning is happening when a parent delves into the possible details without having to go into helicopter-mode.

Unfortunately, the road through high school and college for students and their parents has really unrealistic parts.  High school presents so much pressure as students are supposed to take lots of hard classes and do well in them all, shine on standardized tests, have time to do meaningful extracurriculars, and oh, yes -- sleep.  Not to mention being a member of the family, having friends, and being an upstanding member of whatever community they are in.

College is a must, right?  What is the point of high school but to get into a great college.  That is defined by individuals in so many ways.  And, students are then asked to become proactive adults in an environment that may feel similar but may not.  Once a student goes to orientation they should be good, right?

I disagree with that assumption.  It is a big leap from high school to college.  That leap can feel not so big if there isn't a difference between the type of place or people.  But, does a student want a repeat of the last four years in terms of the way subjects are taught or the type of people they interact with daily?

That is why I have designed OPTION PLAY and ENTER THE CAVE, and why it is important to use my workshop LEARNING TO USE YOUR RUBY SLIPPERS.  I help students transition successfully from high school to college by examining scenarios written by college freshmen and sophomores through playing a fun and easy game.  Using those scenarios, through the games or workshop, gives students and their parents a script to begin conversations with and situations to think about or prepare for.

The other night, I did something I have wanted to do for several months.  I went to hear Frank Bruni talk about his book, Where You Go Is Not Who You'll Be.   I had already read the book, and then found a copy of his, Born Round.  I am glad I read both books because Mr. Bruni has walked the walk.  In the intro of Where You Go I found a statement that stayed with me through the remainder of data, interviews, and cases that I so love to read.

"College is a singular opportunity to rummage through and luxuriate in ideas, to give your brain a vigorous workout and your soul a thorough investigation, to realize how large the world is and to contemplate your desired place in it.  And, that's being lost in the admissions mania, which sends the message that college is a sanctum to be breached--a border to be crossed--rather than a land to be inhabited and tilled for all that it's worth." (10)

Today, I was talking with a man who is very skilled with working to show young people that they can accomplish more than they thought they could by facing discomfort and leaping into some sense of the unknown (with a harness of course).  I asked him where he had gone to college and he seemed reluctant to tell me after we had been talking about much better known schools.  I pressed him about this, and he told me his college had challenged the Federal Government on the subject of exerting control over the college when its students received Pell Grants,  Grove City College, in the late 70s according to my friend, took the issue all the way to the Supreme Court and won.  And, they told the Federal Government that if the Pell Grant wasn't awarded they, the college, would supply the student's funding.

There is nothing to feel reluctant about there.

Successfully transitioning to college sets up a student to feel confident enough to rummage through and luxuriate in the ideas learned at any college.  It takes some work, and some structured risk, and it is oh, so worth it.

Staying Away from the Changeup

People don't resist change. They resist being changed. Peter Senge

Finding this quote has become essential to me as I move from doing what seems to come naturally to doing what needs to be done.  Initially, the quote looked like an explanation but now it looks like a method.

I realize that throughout my life I haven't wanted to invent something that never existed before, rather, I believe I can help people do what they do in a better way. It is easier now to see where my asking "why?" so often came from.  Filtering through a game encourages players to address real situations while they are flirting with being someone or something else.  My "whys" are no longer as important as my "tries".  

Since 2012, I have learned about high school student, counselor, and parent concerns regarding going to college from focus groups and research. Students work hard academically in high school, and also want their concerns about going to college validated. Counselors balance the application process, producing graduates, and feeling confident about sending their students on to the next step. Parents want their children to succeed, and are at times less appreciative of the importance of trial and error, because they are busy taking care of so much. 

I believe I can help all of these people do what they do more effectively.

According to Senge, there are four challenges in initiating changes.

There must be a compelling case for change (that would be learning to go to college)

There must be time to change (that must be made now)

There must be help during the change process (that would be my games)

As the perceived barriers to change are removed, it is important that some new problem, not before considered important or perhaps not even recognized, doesn't become a critical barrier (that would be a player holding onto who they are, while learning to adapt)

I believe I can help people do what they need to in a better way.

And, then, the next step beckons to me:  Getting Things Done.

The President, Dalai Lama, Prime Minister, Queen, and all the rest of us start our days with the same breath.  And, we all strive to get things done.  What those things are make up the textures of our lives.  

What do I need to do at the moment?  I need a website!?  People are asking, and it is about time I finished this particular task.  Let me try out Mr. Senge's observations:

Compelling case:  I NEED a website.  Not having a website is holding my journey back!

Time to change:  I am piloting this ship, so NOW

Help:  Diva Design, Square Space, what I need to say and offer

New Problem?  I do not know how to do this, and so it becomes another thing to figure out, and I feel overwhelmed, scared, and befuddled.

People don't resist change.  They resist being changed.  I am resisting being changed because I want someone else to do this for me, and I really need to do it myself.     OK, that feels, better...

OPTION PLAY is ONE thing you can to do to increase the possibility of successfully transitioning to college

According to the National Center for Education Statistics, the 2013 6-year graduation rate for first-time, full-time undergraduate students who began their pursuit of a bachelor's degree at a 4-year degree-granting institution in fall 2007 was 59 percent, with public institutions at 58% and private institutions at 65%.

U.S. Department of Education, National Center for Education Statistics. (2015). The Condition of Education 2015 (NCES 2015-144),Institutional Retention and Graduation Rates for Undergraduate Students.

Going to college, for many students, is the logical next step on the journey to adulthood.  It is an awesome opportunity to attempt new things, take calculated risks, learn to respond to missteps and outright failure and ultimately succeed.

Parents, counselors, advisors, and students, themselves, want to successfully transition to this new chapter.  And, that transition is uncomfortable and stressful as roles are stretched, and expectations adjusted. 

But, the goal is the same for all:  a successful experience.  The statistics mentioned above can feel daunting.  But, here is ONE thing you can do – Play OPTION PLAY!

I am Genevieve Griffin, the designer of OPTION PLAY and President of Small Steps Go Places Inc.  Please give me the opportunity to speak with you about playing, signing up for my workshop PRACTICING USING MY RUBY SLIPPERS, or to learn more about where many small steps have led me. Send me an email:  optionplay15@gmail.com.  Also, I would like to know what international students find most challenging about coming to the United States for college.

Successfully transitioning to college is hard work, can be stressful, requires problem solving and communication, and reframing skills students already possess.

Playing OPTION PLAY is hard work that players choose to do, requires problem-solving, making and defending choices, communicating, thinking about skills and characteristics players already have or want to have, and as with any game, can be competitive.  The result of many focus groups is that it is FUN to play.  Playing OPTION PLAY is ONE thing you can do to increase the possibility of having a successful transition to college.  Successfully transitioning to college increases the possibility of graduating, after having a good experience.

Evicting that which I stumble on

Happy New Year 2016

I symbolically ripped off the last calendar page of 2015 and began anew by working through a list of questions from the Chopra group.  List my accomplishments, list my challenges, list what I am grateful for, list what I still want to accomplish...it is kind of like doing an exercise plan or yoga class.  Don't think about it too much and just do it!  This is not the way I spend most of my time, and in reflecting on 2015 that was a problem.

During my first yoga class of 2016, Mary (yoga teacher and wise woman) spoke about the connection between calendar and Kali.  Kali is a goddess not known for happily going with the flow or even caring.

Again, for me, not who I perceive myself to be.  And, I must say, the calendar as a symbol of time has not been happily going with the flow or even caring.  This past year contained many incredibly positive accomplishments (resulting from hard work, but accomplishments they are)

• Small Steps Go Places ®
• OPTION PLAY (prototype)
• ENTER THE CAVE (prototype)
• Small Steps Go Places Inc.
• Numerous visits with groups of high school and college students, residential life staffs, guidance counselors, international student orientation providers resulting in lots of feedback about OPTION PLAY
• ENTER THE CAVE development and game plays
• Christmas season celebrations!!

and also much loss, hurt, and discomfort:

• Feather died
• Gram died
• Melissa died
• Health issues for people whom I love
• Squirrel in my linen closet
• Crazy people doing and saying startling things
• NY State escapees
• Violent world events

  It was balanced many times, for sure.  And, isn't that what I was seeking --- balance?

Which brings me back to the new year...
I have taken ideas, hopes, and dreams and with much work, focus, passion and support turned them into actual things.  Hey, I have a TRADEMARK!!  It is not KLEENEX ® or SKIPPY® but it is way cool to be able to put my ® on Small Steps Go Places ® because that is ME.  
And, I have two PROTOTYPES of GAMES!!  I have to go back to those earlier blog posts and see if I actually thought I would do that.
And, I now have an S-Corp, which means I am an ENTREPRENEUR!

My husband and I share a funny phrase:  It's all Genevieve, all the time...   and that is what this all is.

And, now for the reason for the title:  despite all of this living, working, and all Genevieve, I still am walking around with that unwelcome voice stuck inside of my head that let's me know it is:

• not enough
• not real
• not good
• not valuable
• embarrassing
• too out there
• unclear
• not functional, and the list goes on and on.

OK, I know that I am not the only person renting mind space to this most unhelpful voice.  And, I have had more than my share of working with people who have ideas for showing these messages to

 I think it is time to EVICT this unhelpful voice because I think it is time for me to grow and make

THIS IMAGE:                                            INTO SOMETHING MORE PROACTIVE!

THAT IS WHAT I AM TRYING TO DO!!  I have accomplished some things and no one knows about me.  Inviting people to know about me means risking rejection and questions (ugghh) and means I need to state what my goal is (yipes!!).  But, people going to college more prepared to do their own work, and having fun learning about it, is what I am all about!!

So, I am taking a huge risk by saying out in the light that I need to SHARE, TRY, AND EXPERIENCE REJECTION.  Remember, it's all Genevieve all the time so chances are I will figure out how to deal with these things and grow from them.

1.  I want to celebrate the fact that I have made a lot of progress. 


2.  I do not want to just accept others questioning what I do, because as one of the very wise women in my life says "it's an opportunity."  Let me use the opportunity.

3.  I need feedback.  Right now I am wondering what scenarios international students, and students who go to college in a different geographical area from their upbringing, deal with.
It seems to be too difficult to make comments on my blog so send me an email at 

optionplay15@gmail.com.

4.  Are you going to college in the fall, are you a residential life person, a guidance counselor, or a parent trying to help their child be prepared to have a growthful college experience?  Send me an email and I will try to send you a prototype of OPTION PLAY.  I say "try" because sending things domestically works but I do not know about internationally.  That falls under "opportunity."

Lists can be a great way to get things done (You can do it!)

Look what I found!!  I knew it existed -- A LIST FOR BEING SUCCESSFUL!!  But, wait a minute, what about the human reality of what this list is asking?

Some of it is common sense but there are things that get in the way; like "get to class."  That is absolutely TRUE!  If you do not go to class you have a problem.  But, what it should say is "Figure out how to wake up when your alarm goes off, and then GET TO CLASS!"  Some of us have got the sleep thing figured out, and the alarm thing figured out, but some of us don't.

So, I am just saying -- READ WITH AN EYE TO WHAT IS NOT SAID, and then by all means let's figure out how to check off the list!!!

A CHECKLIST SUMMARY OF KEY COLLEGE-SUCCESS

PRINCIPLES & STRATEGIES

1. ACTIVE INVOLVEMENT  

    Inside the Classroom:

    þGet To Class—treat it like a job—if you “cut,” your pay (grade) will be cut.

    þGet Involved in Class—come prepared, listen actively, take notes, and participate.

    Outside the Classroom:

    þRead Actively—take notes while you read to increase attention and retention.

    þSpend a Significant Amount of Time on Academic Activities Outside of Class—

         make it a  40-hour work week.

2. UTILIZING CAMPUS RESOURCES

    Capitalize on Academic & Student Support Services: 

    þLearning Center

    þCollege Library

    þAcademic Advisement

    þCareer Development 

    þPersonal Counseling

    Capitalize on Experiential Learning Opportunities:

    þParticipate in co-curricular experiences on campus.

    þParticipate in service-learning (volunteer) experiences and internships off campus.

3. SOCIAL INTERACTION & COLLABORATION

    Interact with:

    þPeers—by joining campus clubs and student organizations.

    þFaculty—by connecting with them immediately after class, in their offices, or

         by e-mail.

    þAcademic Advisors—see them for more than just a signature to register; find an

         advisor you can relate to and with whom you can develop an ongoing relationship.

    þMentors—try to find experienced people on campus who can serve as trusted

         guides and role models.

    Collaborate by:

    þForming Learning Teams—not only last-minute study groups, but teams that

         collaborate more regularly to work on such tasks as taking lecture notes,

         completing reading assignments, editing writing assignments, conducting library

         research, and reviewing results of exams and course assignments.

    þParticipating in Learning Communities—enroll in two or more classes with the

         same students during the same term.

5. SELF-REFLECTION

    þTake Self-Assessment Tests—to gain greater awareness of your interests, values,

         abilities, learning habits, learning styles, self-concept, and personality traits.

   þSelf-Monitor your learning—maintain awareness of how you are learning, what

         you are learning, and if you are learning. 

   þReflect on Feedback—seek information form others (professionals and peers) on

         the quality of your performance and what specifically you can do to improve it.

    þReflect on Your Future—from time to time, take time from the daily grind to look

         ahead, set long-term goals, and develop strategic plans for your major, your career,

         and your life.

≉

The foregoing material has been excerpted and adapted from the following source:

Cuseo, J., Fecas, V. S., & Thompson, A. (2007). Thriving in

     College & Beyond: Research-Based Strategies for Academic

     Success & Personal Development. Dubuque, IA:

     Kendall/Hunt.

I LOVE that it is strategies for THRIVING!!  

"Learn to solve your own problems..."

Yesterday:  I have created games that I feel very, very good about.  Now comes developing and executing a plan to market them.  I can't tell you how messy my worktable is!!

Okay, I feel pretty overwhelmed right now.  There are index cards, thoughts, questions and lists pulling at me from all directions.

I need to learn about The American Freshmen.
I need to find international students to help write the scenarios that will become my International Student, and "I'm am not from where my college is" edition.
I need to figure out what makes a training pack.
I need to make a presentation for Kickstarter.
I need to meet Frank Bruni.
I need to read the article penned by the Stanford admissions person about helicopter parents.*
And, I am working on finding a First Year Experience and International Student connection in a college in all 50 states (Wisconsin and West Virginia are done).

And, that is just what has come to mind in the last minute.

Also, dinner, dog walk, switching clothes to fall/winter, emails for food for Thanksgiving, and getting ready to go to Ann Arbor this weekend!!

Whew, I feel better now...

Today:  I am reading the Washington Post article about helicopter parents, and yes, I can be one.  Just ask my creative, interesting, and very capable children.  But, there is often a sway that happens when an opinion hits the news stands. (Coffee=Bad, Coffee=Good)  How about the middle road?

*Helicopter Parenting article

So, why does someone become a helicopter parent?  In my experience, this would include lack of trust of the "experts," lack of understanding that a little communication can go a long way, disbelief that anyone can appreciate my children the way I can, and perhaps an overwhelming awe that kids these days can have SO MANY opportunities (and wanting to get in on that).

Oh, yes, middle road...

Learning means taking some chances, trying to make things work, taking what we are reading or doing and using it in either the same way or a different way, and owning the results.  Getting an A or getting IN is just the beginning.
Once a person has that accomplishment DOES IT RUN?

My games are based on experiential learning.  That means controlled RISK TAKING, TRIAL AND ERROR, considering situations that really will happen maybe before they do.


I just had a wonderful coffee break with Lily, a parent who I have had the pleasure to meet at school.  I am not good at small talk -- and I talk a lot, and Lily made me feel happy and accomplished regardless of how much I talked.  She is the inspiration for today's post.  Self-reliance is the gift that keeps on giving!!

I'm registered!

Today appears to be the 100th post of Small Steps, and I NOW HAVE A REGISTERED TRADEMARK!  This leg of my journey grew out of the realization that when I Googled Small Steps Go Places my blog came up first.  The gift came when I acted on that realization!  Yoga, Meditation, Alisa and perhaps most of all my own focus and drive has grown out of that gift.

I have spent just a few minutes looking through past posts.  Overall, I can see the steps I have taken.  I seem to be staying true to my own focus.

Now, it is going to get interesting.  I have to go back to All Marketers are Liars (Seth Godin), and figure out how to explain in a video what I have done (for Kick Starter?)


But, regardless, today I am Registered!